pets are awesome,  so that happened

Fingers Crossed!

I am currently typing with only seven fingers, down from my usual eight (pinky fingers are decorative), because the middle finger on my left hand is wrapped in multiple layers of gauze. Beneath the bandage, it now strongly resembles ET’s finger, only without the magical properties and with far more blood.


It’s attractive, is what I’m saying.

Fortunately this is a relatively recent development, because I had a wedding to attend at the weekend and one bobble-ended finger possibly in need of an amputation would never have gone with my dress. Unfortunately, I am now on a course of antibiotics, which is never ideal heading into the weekend.

A fortnight ago, my finger was caught in an unfortunate accident involving a toy and a tiny kitten claw. It was sliced clean along the part where the nail meets the skin, and it hurt, and I growled, and the kitten in question – Maya – looked at me and licked it tentatively as if to apologise.

Now I don’t know if you know this, but cat mouths are filthy.


This makes cat apology licks the mini Komodo Dragon bites of the pet world.

Over the next few days my finger struggled to sort itself out, but a week on I was at least able to paint my nails without any real pain. It seemed to be healing. Last Monday however, in a stroke of bad fortune and cat hyperactivity, Maya managed to catch the same finger in the exact same place with, presumably, the same claw that had done the damage in the first instance.

This time I let out more than a growl. This time, several expletives were uttered.

My finger developed its own unsettling heartbeat, and two days later it had swollen to a shiny plumpness. It started to turn a particularly unattractive shade of purple. A very ripe purple. Like an bruised aubergine (eggplant for the Americanos), or that grape that you leave til the end because you’re not positive it’s still edible.

I sent Scrubs occasional photographic finger updates (which I’m sure he more than thrilled to receive). Nothing like some light midday gore to remind you how much you love someone. That evening he arrived home with a prescription.

“You need to take antibiotics,” he said, as I gingerly wrapped a turquoise bandage dotted with Baby Looney Tunes characters around my fingertip. I nodded absent-mindedly.

The next morning I sent him another photo update.

“I don’t think I need antibiotics, it isn’t any worse.”

Scrubs wrote back, “Go on antibiotics.”

Two hours later, the purpling had intensified. I sent another photo update.

“Okay now it’s worse.”

Scrubs wrote back, “Go on antibiotics! x”

Have I mentioned Scrubs is a patient soul?

Once my fingernail started to look like it was lodged firmly in a questionably coloured bean-bag of skin, I finally took my prescription and got it filled. On the upside, the finger is now a lot less purple, a lot less swollen, and the risk of amputation is significantly less. On the downside, it’s Friday and I’m on antibiotics.

I’m off to read the pharmaceutical leaflet to find out if Germentin is compatible with the reckless consumption of White Russians…


  • Anonymous

    Ew ew ew!! I can actually imagine what it looks like in my mind. Thanks for that! If you still need a bandage during the wedding, you should rhinestone the crap out of it and make a fashion statement. That’s my two cents…


    HAHA! OH MY GOD HORRIBLE! I mean, delightful for me to read about but HORRIBLE for you! Cat mouths ARE filthy, you should hear the shit my cat says, filthy filthy things;) Quinn, I’m so glad you moseyed over to my little corner of the blogosphere, then craftily drew me back to your lair to behold the general awesomeness that is your blog!

  • Angela

    And people question why I’m not a pet person?!?
    Imagine it had been a claw in the eye….no don’t, that’s awful, why did I eve nsay that?!
    I hope it heals quckly!!! Be careful mixing antibiotics with White Russians, they go much better with a good Pinot Grigiot 😉 Happy Friday! Enjoy… maybe de-claw the naughty little kitten!

  • The Real Reality Show Blog

    I was so relieved to hear by the end of your post that you had finally gotten the antibiotics. Equally I am now also so troubled that by the end of your post I had already forgotten that you said you are on antibiotics at the beginning of your post. Adorable dress by the way. I think a white gaze would go well with it, or if you decide to go gauze-less, aubergine (which we indeed recognize here in the colonies) will make a nice contrast. Best of luck healing and with future feline encounters.

  • MadKatter

    Oh no!!! Ugh. Those cute littk cotton balls….With Freddy Kruger claws! I’m sorry lovely! I am sending you happy healing vibes!

    Also… Hope the consumption of white Russians will pair well with the antibiotics :(. Soon enough the little cotton balls will learn to be more gentle …. Right!? ❤️❤️

  • Dewy

    Oh dear. It should recover and you can drink alcohol moderately with it. I had to google to find the drug name 😂 we have different brands over here 😊 Next time do as Scrubs says. As soon as it’s swollen it’s infected and needs A/Bs.

  • Soul Gifts

    Listen to Scrubs. He knows. Maybe douse the ET digit with some White Russian. It will appreciate it.
    My Scrubs had a feral cat claw and bit him on the arm – he ended up in the hospital Emergency Dept in the middle of the night. You got off light!

  • Anthony

    Heal well….and quickly. Oddly enough, I wanted to write “heal fashionably”, but not being even remotely fashionable, I had no idea what that actually meant. It just sounded good.
    Maybe I should drink more coffee before I respond to blogs…
    Please get better.

  • Jeff Cann

    I once was bit trying to give my cat a pill. it took about 18 hours for an wicked infection to set in. Not sure what they did 100 years ago. Pet owners must have been missing lost of digits.

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